When faced with a difficult or challenging situation, many of us try to race through the situation as quickly as possible in an effort to get back to a sense of normalcy and equilibrium. For this reason, I often hear parties wish to use mediation to reduce the time they spend going through a divorce. While it is generally true that mediation is faster than a typical litigation process, it does take time.
First, the decisions you make during your divorce process will have lifelong consequences.
These decisions should not be taken lightly or made in a hasty fashion. Sometimes, time is needed outside of mediation to get additional information before making a decision. For example, you may need to get advice from a tax professional, mortgage professional, appraiser, child specialist, and the like.
Second, you or one of the other parties may need time to process that the divorce is happening before a decision can be made.
Working with a mental health professional or a divorce coach may be helpful. In my experience, allowing time for all parties to be emotionally ready for the divorce process results in a better, healthier divorce outcome.
Third, sometimes it is good for families to practice different child residential schedules before settling on one.
This allows time to better understand what will work well for your family. While you can always change the residential schedule by agreement, it is more efficient to do it prior to entry of your parenting plan with the court.
Finally, even if you are emotionally ready for the divorce process and ready for a change in your life, it is a difficult journey.
It is important to have a good support system during the divorce marathon. This may include friends and family, a mental health professional, divorce coach, etc.
